Then to some extent we influence our destiny. And, of course, they are interested in making the choice optimal. That is why it is important to use different tools that will help predict the positive and negative consequences of making a particular decision.

Why do people make bad decisions?

This is not such a simple question if you think about it. You can, of course, get away with the banal: “People are stupid.” But even smart, talented, experienced people make bad decisions. Here's why:

• Lack of time
• Relying on a single source of information
• Emotional experiences
• A large number of thoughts about the problem
• Failure to notice alternatives and new opportunities
• Lack of knowledge and clarity
• Underestimating the amount of time needed to make the right decision
• Reassessment of your own skills, knowledge, abilities and resources
• Fear of making the wrong decision

All these barriers prevent you from making the right decision. And if they work in tandem, trio or quartet, then the situation gets even worse. How to overcome them?

Practice 360-degree thinking

Thoughts influence emotions, emotions influence decisions, and decisions influence actions. And each link in this chain can be optimally configured.

360-degree thinking consists of three critical components, which are also methods. They can be used to effectively analyze a situation, after which it becomes easier to make the right decision.

These are the components:

• A look into the past.
• Foresight.
• Insight.

By using all three of these thinking methods, you view your life from a 360-degree perspective. That is, they work best together.

A look into the past

Looking into the past (aka retrospective analysis) will help you critically evaluate your past. This allows you to comprehensively understand a situation that has already occurred in order to improve your future decisions.

It is useful because it helps you learn from mistakes, problems, failures and past successes. As a result of this learning experience, you can adjust your course of action to move forward much faster.

If you don't know or have never done self-reflection, then this is a very suitable case. Take time to review the decisions you made yesterday. Ask yourself:

• What did I do yesterday?
• What decisions did I make?
• What problems did you encounter?
• How did I deal with these problems?
• How did I deal with the problems that arose when I encountered a problem?
• How does this make me feel?
• From what other point of view can I look at my yesterday's problems?
• What can I learn from yesterday's experience?
• What could I have done differently?
• What do I need to improve to deal with this problem more effectively next time?

Note that this is not just scrolling. negative thoughts(what you usually do), namely self-reflection. You ask yourself the right questions, provide answers, and figure out what you can do better next time. Now you are more aware of what decisions and in what state you are making.

From now on, you will begin to approach your problems and decision-making more consciously, and not on autopilot. Next time there is a greater chance of doing everything right. In other words, you drew the right conclusions from past experience - this is what all successful people do.

It should be remembered that you should not use the past to make decisions in the future. Each situation is unique in its own way. What works today may not work tomorrow. But the process of self-reflection itself is very useful because it forces you to reflect on your thinking, actions and decisions.

Foresight

Foresight is the ability to predict future events, changes, trends and the consequences of one's actions. Moreover, it is the ability to explore alternative scenarios that could potentially unfold.

This mindset is useful because it helps you see and predict what might be ahead. Therefore, you will be better able to identify opportunities and make much less mistakes when making decisions.

Foresight works great in tandem with hindsight. This way, you can use the past as a barometer to predict the future and therefore make better decisions.

To develop foresight, you need to learn how to successfully address potential threats and identify your needs in advance. This is planning, as well as gathering the necessary resources that will help in the future.

Ask yourself the following questions:

• How will this decision affect the future?
• How will this decision affect my future decisions?
• What are the consequences of making this decision?
• What options will I have after making this decision?
• What problems will arise?
• What if everything goes wrong? How will I react?
• What is my plan B and C?
• What happens if...?

Foresight is not an exact science. It's more of a game where you try to use a combination of lessons learned from the past and ideas from the present to make the best decision.

By considering these two factors, you can generate possible future scenarios that will help you make better decisions.

Insight

Insight is the ability to discern the true nature of a situation. This is the ability to understand your situation, as well as cause-and-effect relationships. In other words, we're talking about about gaining an accurate understanding of the people, events and circumstances in your life.

Insight is often the catalyst for creativity, innovation and inspiration. This is what brings out those “Eureka!” moments, when all the puzzle pieces suddenly come together into something that makes sense. It's like you've come out of a fog and are now finally seeing things in a whole new way that opens up a world of new possibilities.

However, it is worth saying that the ideas that come to your mind are nothing more than an interpretation of reality based on past experiences, as well as perceptions and expectations of the future. In short, real insight only comes when you have mastered the other two ways of thinking.

The best entrepreneurs and politicians in the world have this skill. To master it, you need to read a lot, understand people and be curious. But even this is not enough. You need to learn to understand your thinking patterns, get rid of cognitive distortions, be in a conscious state and see the essence of things. In a sense, we are talking about intuition.

Start by becoming more observant of what is happening around and within you. Notice the world around us and ask deep questions about yourself, others, and the circumstances in which you find yourself. For example:

• Why do I do what I do? Why does this matter to me?
• What do others need? Why is this important to them?
• What's happening? Why is this happening? What does it mean?
• What's the problem? How did this become a problem? Why is it still a problem?
• Why are the circumstances the way they are and not others?
• How did this happen and why does it matter?
• What is the value of knowing this? How does this knowledge change my perspective?
• What's another way to look at this situation? Why is this important?
• Why did this happen? What led to this? What happened before this? Is there a connection?
• How are these two events related? Why are they connected in this way?
• How was this done? Who did it? Could it have been different?

If you start asking these and similar questions, you will become very attentive and observant. Tyrion Lannister, if you will, who often asked himself what others needed and carefully analyzed the events of his life and the world around him.

You will learn to understand why things are the way they are and how they could potentially be different. In fact, you cease to be a passive observer. As a result, you begin to think critically about yourself, about others, and about the circumstances with which you are dealing. All this stimulates the emergence of deeper thoughts, allowing you to draw conclusions in situations that you have never considered before. This opens up new levels of understanding.

There are situations when the solution lies on the surface, you just need to extend your hand. Others are complex and consist of many factors. To make the right decision, you need to use 360-degree thinking, looking at the problem from all sides. It won’t happen right away, but certain results will be visible after the first use of this technique.

Practice step-by-step decision making process

Step One: Get Clear on What You Want

Your first step is to clearly understand your desired outcome and identify the resources needed to achieve that outcome. Ask yourself:

• What is my desired outcome?
• What exactly would I like to achieve?
• What might be required to achieve this result?
• How should I prioritize my efforts?

Understanding what result you want to achieve is important because it (understanding) helps direct all efforts towards achieving one goal. Then you will be able to make more effective decisions.

Step Two: Take Action to Achieve Your Desired Results

When you don't quite understand how to get to your desired destination, it's easy to panic. However, the important thing is that you take the first step.

You only need to take one step that will move you a little closer to your desired result. There is likely still a lot of fog ahead, but it is clear that this action is necessary. For example, if you're looking to buy a car and are completely overwhelmed by the number of options, your first step might be to read car-specific forums. By learning to understand the topic, you can make a more informed decision.

In any difficult decision There are always several actions that you can start with. At some point you will make progress and the next steps will become more obvious.

Step Three: Track Your Results

You should always be vigilant about what works and what doesn't work. There is no point in wasting valuable time on ineffective tools.

However, to start measuring progress, you need to understand what exactly you will be measuring. Ask yourself the following questions:

• How will I know I'm moving in the right direction?
• How exactly will I measure my progress?
• How will I know that I have achieved my goal?

The more clarity you have about where you are in the process, the better the decision.

Step Four: Stay Flexible in Your Decision Making

The action plan will always be revised, because it is impossible to predict all the factors in this absurd world. Therefore, you must be flexible in your decisions and actions at all times. Keep your long-term goals in mind at all times to help you stay on track.

Ask yourself:

• What results do I want to achieve?
• What am I doing now?
• Is my current action getting me closer to results?
• This is the most best way do this?
• What should I change to get better results?

Don't lose your temper if things don't go as planned. This is fine. Find out why you veered off course, be curious rather than annoyed. With the curiosity of a scientist, ask yourself questions and look for optimal solutions.

Complete decision making process

The previous point was rather preparatory and theoretical. Here we will talk about full process decision making. It will require significantly more time, which means it needs to be used if the problem facing you is really important.

Step One: Get Clarity

Let's first understand the importance of the decision you are about to make. Ask yourself:

• What are the options?
• What decision should I ideally make?
• Why is this decision so important?
• How will it help me?
• How important is this decision for my loved ones?
• Can it change my life?
• Do other people understand the importance of this decision?

It is worth being clear about the importance of the decision you are about to make because it will help determine how much effort and time you will spend.

Step Two: Gather the Facts and Explore Options

Sometimes a decision requires collecting a lot of information. And, if it is important to you, then you need to allocate enough time to it.

Once you've gathered all the information you need, take the time to consider possible ways forward. Ask yourself:

• What decision can I make?
• What actions can I take?
• What options are there?
• What will I need?

For one solution you may need money, help from other people and a lot of time. For others - a lot of work and patience. What will be best for you?

It's time to look at the pros and cons of each solution option. Ask yourself:

• What are the benefits of this course of action?
• What are the disadvantages?
• What are the advantages of one option over the other?

As you ask yourself these questions, think about the sacrifices you will have to make in the first and second case. They may not be obvious: sometimes you can ruin relationships with others by making decisions that do not affect them.

It all basically comes down to opportunity cost. Taking one course of action may not allow you to take another, and there may be advantages and disadvantages to different options.

Step Four: Determine the Worst-Case Scenario

Remember Murphy's Law: “If something bad can happen, it will happen.” Take it into account whenever you make a decision.

Ask yourself, “What is the worst that could happen if I make this decision. How will I deal with the consequences?

Of course, the worst case scenario may not always happen. But you need to be prepared for it. At least psychologically. After weighing the pros and cons and figuring out what worst-case scenarios await you, make a decision. But remember that it should be flexible so that if something goes wrong, you can quickly rebuild and update your action plan.

Step Five: Learn from Experience

You made a decision and now you either reap the rewards of your efforts or regret your mistakes. In any case, all this is an experience that needs to be appreciated. Ask yourself:

• What did I learn from this experience?
• What have I learned about how I make decisions?
• Was this decision completely in keeping with my personality and my values?
• Have I achieved the desired result?
• Did I adjust my actions when I encountered problems?

There are many questions you could ask yourself. So please don't limit yourself to just these. Think of others you might ask, especially after mistakes, defeat, or failure.

We wish you good luck!

When people share the worst decisions they have made in their lives, they often cite the fact that the choice was made in a fit of instinctive emotions: passion, fear, greed.

Our life would be completely different if Ctrl+Z operated in life, which would cancel decisions made.

But we are not slaves to our mood. Instinctive emotions tend to dull or disappear altogether. Therefore, folk wisdom recommends that when you need to make an important decision, it is better to go to bed. Good advice, by the way. It wouldn't hurt to take note! Although for many decisions, sleep alone is not enough. A special strategy is needed.

One of the effective tools that we would like to offer you is strategy for success at work and in life from Susie Welch(Suzy Welch) - former editor-in-chief of the Harvard Business Review, popular author, television commentator and journalist. It's called 10/10/10 and involves making decisions through the prism of three different time frames:

• How will you feel about it 10 minutes later?
• How will you feel about this decision 10 months from now?
• What will your reaction be to this in 10 years?

By focusing our attention on these deadlines, we distance ourselves some distance from the problem of making an important decision.

Now let's look at the effect of this rule using an example.

Situation: Veronica has a boyfriend, Kirill. They have been dating for 9 months, but their relationship can hardly be called ideal. Veronica claims that Kirill is wonderful person, and in many ways he is exactly what she has been looking for all her life. However, she is very worried that their relationship is not moving forward. She is 30, she wants a family and... She doesn’t have an endless amount of time to develop her relationship with Kirill, who is approaching 40. During these 9 months, she never met Kirill’s daughter from her first marriage, and the cherished “I love you” was never heard in their couple from either side.

The divorce from my wife was terrible. After this, Kirill decided to avoid serious relationships. Moreover, he keeps his daughter out of his personal life. Veronica understands that he is hurt, but she is also offended that such an important part of her loved one’s life is closed to her.

Veronica knows that Kirill does not like to rush into making decisions. But should she then take the step herself and say “I love you” first?

The girl was advised to use the 10/10/10 rule, and this is what came out of it. Veronica was asked to imagine that right now she had to decide whether she would confess her love to Kirill over the weekend or not.

Question 1: How will you feel about this decision 10 minutes later?

Answer:“I think I would be worried, but at the same time proud of myself for taking a risk and saying it first.”

Question 2: How would you feel about your decision if 10 months had passed?

Answer:“I don’t think I’ll regret it 10 months from now. No, I won't. I sincerely want everything to work out. Those who don’t take risks don’t drink champagne!”

Question 3: How will you feel about your decision 10 years later?

Answer:“No matter how Kirill reacts, in 10 years the decision to confess your love first is unlikely to matter. By this time, either we will be happy together, or I will be in a relationship with someone else."

Note that the 10/10/10 rule works! As a result we have quite simple solution:

Veronica must take the lead. She will be proud of herself if she does this, and sincerely believes that she will not regret what she did, even if nothing works out with Kirill in the end. But without consciously analyzing the situation according to the 10/10/10 rule, making an important decision seemed extremely difficult to her. Short-term emotions—fear, nervousness, and fear of rejection—were distracting and inhibiting factors.

What happened to Veronica after that, you are probably wondering. She still said “I love you” first. In addition, she tried to do everything to change the situation and stop feeling in limbo. Kirill did not confess his love to her. But progress was evident: he became closer to Veronica. The girl believes that he loves her, that he just needs a little more time to overcome his own and admit that the feelings are reciprocated. In her opinion, the chances that they will be together reach 80%.

In the end

The 10/10/10 rule helps you win the emotional game. The feelings that you are experiencing now, at this moment, seem intense and sharp, and the future, on the contrary, is vague. Therefore, emotions experienced in the present are always in the foreground.

The 10/10/10 strategy forces you to change your perspective: consider a moment in the future (for example, in 10 months) from the same point that you look at in the present.

This technique puts your short-term emotions into perspective. This is not to say that you should ignore them. Often they even help you get what you want in a given situation. But you shouldn't let your emotions get the better of you.

It is necessary to remember the contrast of emotions not only in life, but also at work. For example, if you deliberately avoid having a serious conversation with your boss, you are allowing your emotions to get the better of you. If you imagine the possibility of having a conversation, then after 10 minutes you will be just as nervous, but after 10 months, will you be glad that you decided to have this conversation? Will you breathe a sigh of relief? Or will you feel proud?

What if you want to reward a great employee and are about to offer him a promotion: will you doubt your decision 10 minutes later, will you regret what you did 10 months later (in case other employees feel left out), and will it Does the promotion make any difference to your business 10 years from now?

As you can see, short-term emotions are not always harmful. The 10/10/10 rule suggests that looking at emotions in the long term is not the only correct way. It only proves that the short-term feelings you experience cannot be at the head of the table when you make important and responsible decisions.

Each of us at a certain point in time faces a certain choice. There is a need to make a decision. Before you implement it, you need to weigh the pros and cons so that you don’t regret missed opportunities later. There are various ways and decision-making techniques that will help you make difficult choices and eliminate indecision and feelings of dissatisfaction.

Main difficulties

How to make a decision in a short time and not reproach yourself later for making the wrong choice? This question is asked by many people who find themselves in such a situation. What to rely on, where is the truth and where is the lie?

In order to do this, the following rules must be observed:

• take your time, give yourself time

Whatever the situation, it is better to take a short time-out and think carefully before making a decision. The modern pace of life leaves less and less time for thinking and requires an instant response, however, it is better to think a little and do it than to later look for a way out of a deadlock.

There are two types of people who can be divided into two types: slow-witted and hasty. The first ones think carefully and weigh everything before making a decision, which is why they may miss profitable opportunities or be late. As a rule, people of this type are afraid of responsibility and, on a subconscious level, want someone else to do it for them. However, the decisions made by slow-witted people are distinguished by great wisdom and balance.

“Hurry people” are people who act first and think later. They can instantly make a decision and not doubt their choice, only then the consequences can be very unpredictable and give rise to even more problems. Excellent leaders, irreplaceable where you need to quickly find your bearings.

Your task is to find the “golden mean” and, in various life circumstances, act as the situation requires.

• focus on

Often this quiet inner voice tells us the right decisions, but we don’t hear it at all behind the “noise” of other thoughts and experiences. To understand what he wants to convey to us, do an exercise called “Awareness.” To do this, take a comfortable position and relax, then concentrate your gaze on some luminous object. Try not to focus on the thoughts that come to your mind, leave it “empty”. After some time, you will be able to feel certain sensations in your body or thoughts that will visit you like insights. It will become obvious to you how best to act in a given situation.

• don't make a deal with yourself

Always listen to your feelings, they rarely deceive. However, one should not confuse fleeting sensations such as anger, resentment, anger, fear with deep sensations that are constantly present in the soul. They are the ones who can advise the right way out from any situation, but you should not make a decision under the influence of emotions. This can cause big problems.

It so happens that in a situation of choice, a certain decision, based on logical reasoning, seems to be the most correct, but, as they say, it is not to the soul. In this case, reliance should be placed on the “inner voice”, since, in most cases, it shows the right path.

• don't let yourself be pressured

Don't make decisions based on immediate circumstances. It will not be yours, but the crowd that imposed it. However, you, not the crowd, will have to pay for the consequences of such a choice. Decisions made under pressure then cause feelings of dissatisfaction, emptiness and missed opportunities. For example, a young woman is forced to marry a man who is disgusting to her and does not need her. However, relatives insist, because it will be beneficial for everyone. The groom is promising and wealthy, the girl and her family will become related to a rich and high-ranking family. The choice is hers. Having succumbed to the influence of her relatives, she can say “yes,” but the question is whether her future life will be happy, or say “no” and be free.

• impact analysis

Of course, it is impossible to calculate all life scenarios. However, it is quite possible to imagine the overall picture of making a particular decision. Don't fuss, don't push yourself, this can lead to a serious mistake. Give yourself time to think everything through; only in a relaxed state can you solve this or that problem and draw a conclusion.

• coming to terms with losses

There is such a factor as alternative possibilities. It is impossible to do everything and try everything in this life. We choose a certain path for ourselves and often regret the missed opportunities. What would happen if: I married “Ivanov”, agreed to work in this company, went to live in another city, etc. It always seems to us that if we had acted differently, our lives would have turned out much better.

Therefore, before accepting definite decision imagine what you might miss and be okay with it. In the future, it will be easier to recognize this as a consequence of your own choice, and not of “evil fate.”

Decision making methods

You can make the right choice using the following methods:

• "action - reflection"

This method of decision-making came to us from the east from the Japanese samurai. In battle, a quick assessment of the situation and an appropriate reaction were necessary. This method is good for people in military professions, doctors, rescuers, and athletes. They are required to quickly assess the situation and make the right decisions. This doesn't always work out. However, this approach provides a large amount of information, which allows one to accumulate certain experience in responding to extreme situations and prepare specialists for this.

The quick reaction of people whose profession requires immediate response in certain situations is based on the knowledge that was accumulated by their predecessors. They do not work “at random”, but know what reaction will follow as a result of this or that action.

• "reflection - action"

A lot of different literature has been written about this method of decision-making. This is the Western approach. In the East, they have a different opinion on this matter and believe that if you think about something for too long, then nothing good will come of it.

Of course, long thoughts give rise to a large number of diverse thoughts, which are then forgotten. Therefore, all information must be recorded on paper and then analyzed. Thus, you will have before your eyes a visual display of all mental activity, with the help of which you can collect all the “cockroaches” together and get a logically balanced decision.

This is what forensic specialists often do during the investigation process. They attach evidence, photographs, significant aspects of the case to a special board that is in front of them and try to put all the pieces together.

The “reflection-action” method works quite well, with its help you can get mature, informed decisions on a particular problem.

• "insight"

This is one of the most incomprehensible and mysterious methods. It is also often symbolically designated in the form of a burning light bulb. The individual suddenly has an “insight” regarding some issue. On an intuitive level, without having much information, he can very quickly make one decision or another.

This method is also called “feeling” or inner vision. Answers to assigned tasks are found on the basis of extensive accumulated experience in a particular business or talent. For example, this includes brilliant commanders such as A. Suvorov, F. Ushakov, etc., who did not suffer a single defeat in battles, controlling the army and relying on their intuition and experience.

This method of decision making has four stages:

• preparatory

This is the moment when a person begins to look for a solution to a particular problem. He reads literature, looks through various sources, experiences something in practice.

• maturation

At this stage, the individual begins to put all the information received together in order to make a final decision.

• insight

This is the moment when a person finds the small missing fragment for the entire big “picture” that he created earlier, based on accumulated experience.

• implementation

After insight, the individual begins to apply mature solutions in practice to check whether his guesses are correct.

Vivid examples Various inventions can serve this purpose. For example, the classic suspension bridge design was created in a similar way. The scientist who made a discovery in this area searched for a long time for a solution to this problem. He studied many books, however, the idea finally formed in his head only when he saw a spider weaving a web.

These three methods are the main and most common in modern world. Each of them has its own advantages and disadvantages, which one to choose - it all depends on you.

Decision making is influenced by certain factors, these include the following:

• room temperature

This is associated with feelings of bodily comfort. As a number of experiments show, people tend to make more loyal and positive decisions if the room is warm and comfortable. However, there is a tendency to shift the responsibility for taking it to someone else.

• limited choice

The fewer choices a person has, the more satisfied he is with decision taken. During the experiment, a situation was created in which two groups of people participated. The first was offered a choice of 25 candies, and the other was only given five, of which only one had to be chosen.

Those participants in the experiment who were provided with a smaller assortment experienced greater satisfaction and promised to definitely purchase these candies.

• irritation

A state of slight irritation allows you to take a more balanced answer to the question of any situation and present weighty arguments in its defense. This happens because the stress hormone adrenaline begins to be released in the body, which stimulates psychological defense mechanisms. The brain begins an active search for the optimal solution.

• intuition

Intuition helps solve more complex problems, while simple ones are better left to consciousness. According to scientific research, at the subconscious level the brain functions many times faster, producing a ready-made solution in just 7 seconds.

• background music

Fast music in the background helps you make informed decisions quickly, on a biological level, improving brain function and memory.

• nutrition and physical activity

People who eat right and exercise regularly are able to make decisions quickly and easily. , frequent and physical inactivity significantly reduce brain activity. Consciousness becomes as if clouded.

• level intellectual development

People who constantly educate themselves are able to find answers several times faster than their colleagues. This is due to the fact that they have a large amount of knowledge in certain areas, and are able to quickly assess the situation and eliminate the problem.

These factors can act not only individually, but also in combination, representing a complex of factors that influence decision making.

Making a decision is always difficult; this process is influenced by a large number of different factors, such as pressure from others, limited time frames, missed alternative opportunities, etc. There are several ways: “action - reflection”, “reflection - action”, “insight”. At the same time, such factors as the level of comfort, state of health, level of intellectual development, etc. also influence.

What should you do if you are a leader and you are faced with a difficult choice? Remember, as in a fairy tale: execution cannot be pardoned, dismissal cannot be left, and it is unclear where to put a comma. In this article we will talk about several ways to make the right decision. This will help not only businessmen, but also ordinary people who find themselves in a difficult situation.

If you are trapped

Usually making a difficult decision is necessary in a difficult life situation. Stress affects a person in different ways: some withdraw into themselves, some worry and don’t sleep at night, some become hysterical and take it out on loved ones. One thing remains unchanged: a person seems to fall into the trap of his own psyche, often he is not able to make a choice on his own and acts under the influence of emotions or close circle. Time shows that impulsive and ill-considered decisions are ineffective and can ruin your business, your career, your relationships, in the end. Remember: all serious decisions are made with a cool head. Therefore, before you put into practice the methods described below, do this: turn off your heart and turn on your head. We'll show you how.

There are several ways to pacify emotions:

• short term - breathe correctly. Take 10 deep, slow breaths - this will help you calm down;
• medium-term - imagine that your friend finds himself in such a situation and asks you for advice. What will you tell him? Surely throw away all emotions and try to look at the situation detachedly, objectively. So try it;
• long-term - take a time out. Just let the situation go for a while, do other things, and come back to it after a week or month. This way you will kill two birds with one stone: firstly, you will cut off impulsive decisions and will not cut from the shoulder. And secondly, the right decision will ripen in your head like a ripe fruit - you just need to give it time.

Now that emotions no longer influence your choices, let's talk about eight reliable decision-making methods.

1. Pros and cons method

Use the good old method: take a sheet of paper and a pen, draw the sheet in half. In the left column write all the advantages of the chosen solution, in the right column - respectively, the disadvantages. Don't limit yourself to just a few items: there should be 15-20 items on the list. Then calculate what will be more. Profit!

The essence of the methoda: even if you endlessly scroll through the pros and cons in your head, you are unlikely to see the full picture. Psychologists advise making written lists: this helps to organize the accumulated information, visually see the ratio of pros and cons, and draw a conclusion based on pure mathematics. Why not?

2. Create habits

This method is suitable if you find it difficult to make a choice everyday issues. For example, to increase the salary of a new employee, or if it’s not worth it yet, put it on the website or another company. What to eat for dinner, in the end, French fries or fish with vegetables. A difficult decision, of course, but still not a matter of life and death. In this case, it is useful to consciously create habits for yourself and follow them in the future. For example, introduce an ironclad rule: increase employee salaries only after six months of working in your company. Buying office supplies exclusively from Skrepka is cheaper. Eating light and healthy dishes for dinner will soon thank you. Well, with the call back you get the idea, yes.

The essence of the method: following your habits, you will make simple decisions automatically, saving yourself from unnecessary thoughts, without wasting precious time on nonsense. But then, when you need to make a truly responsible and important choice, you will be fully armed.

3. “If-then” method

This method is suitable for resolving current problems in business, team, and personal life. For example, your employee speaks impolitely to customers and does not respond to comments. Question: should I fire him immediately or try to re-educate him? Try using the “if-then” technique. Tell yourself: if he again mistreats a client, you will deprive him of his bonus. If the incident happens again, fire me.

The essence of the method:as in the first case, this is the creation of conditional boundaries within which you will act. The burden will immediately be lifted from the soul, and life will become much easier. And most importantly, you don’t have to waste time thinking and thinking about the fate of a careless employee.

It was invented by the famous American journalist Susie Welch. The rule is: before you make a difficult decision, stop and answer three questions:

• what will you think about it 10 minutes later;
• How will you feel about your choice in 10 months;
• What will you say in 10 years?

Let's give an example. Let's take a young man who works as a manager, doesn't like his job, but puts up with it because he needs money. He dreams of quitting his job, taking out a loan and opening his own business - a small pub, but at the same time he is desperately afraid of going broke and losing everything he has. In general, a classic case when a bird in the hand is preferred to a pie in the sky.

It’s difficult for our hero to take the first step - quit his hated job. Let's say he does this. In ten minutes he is unlikely to have time to regret his decision. In 10 months, he will already have time to rent the premises, equip the pub and receive clients. And if it doesn’t work out - he’ll find a job as a manager anyway - so what’s there to regret? Well, in 10 years, this choice is unlikely to have any significance at all: either the business will continue, or our hero will work in another place - one of two things. It turns out that if you follow the 10/10/10 rule, making a decision no longer becomes so challenging task, because a person clearly understands what awaits him in the future.

The essence of the method: when making a difficult decision, we are usually overwhelmed by emotions: fear, anxiety, or vice versa, joy and excitement. A person feels it right here and now; feelings obscure the prospects for the future. Remember, as in Yesenin: “You can’t see a face face to face, a big one is seen at a distance.” As long as the future seems foggy and vague, the choice of solution will be postponed again and again. Composing specific plans By presenting his emotions in detail, a person rationalizes the problem and stops being afraid of the unknown - because it becomes simple and understandable.

Read also: Three real stories.

5. Solve within 15 minutes

Paradoxical as it may seem, the most important, strategic decisions should be made in 15 minutes. A familiar situation: a company has encountered serious problem, which requires immediate action, but the point is that no one knows the right solution. For example, competitors have done something nasty, and it is not clear what to do: respond in kind or get out of the situation with dignity. Or the crisis has hit your company, and you are confused: to move to a less prestigious place or to lay off a dozen employees. How can you make the right choice, and is there even one? And you begin to procrastinate, unable to make a decision, in the hope that everything will resolve itself.

If you don’t know which solution is correct, just imagine that there is no correct answer to this life problem. Give yourself 15 minutes and make any, absolutely any, decision. Yes, at first glance this may seem crazy. What about planning, and what about testing and verifying solutions? Ok, ok, if you can quickly and with a minimum investment check the correctness of the solution, check it. If this requires months of time and millions of rubles, it is better to abandon this idea and immediately record the time.

The essence of the method: Needless to say, if you waste time, nothing gets solved: crises don’t go away, rental prices don’t go down, and competitors become even sharper. One unmade decision leads to others, the business sags and becomes ineffective. As they say, it is better to do than to regret, than not to do and regret.

6. Don't limit yourself to narrow boundaries

The same thing we wrote about at the beginning. Execute or pardon, buy a car or not, expand or wait for better times. One of two things, hit or miss, oh, it was not! But who said that a problem has only two solutions? Get out of the narrow framework, try to look at the situation more broadly. It is not necessary to organize a large-scale expansion of production - it is enough to launch a couple of new positions. Instead of an expensive car, you can purchase a more modest option, and apply disciplinary measures to the employee who committed the crime for the first time.

The essence of the method: when there are only two solution options, there is a greater chance of choosing the right decision, and many deliberately simplify their lives by dividing the situation into yes and no, black and white. But life is much more diverse: don’t be afraid to look it in the eye and accept all possible options. The solution may be a compromise, a rejection of both extremes in favor of a third, completely unexpected solution, or a successful combination of two options. This often happens when the owner of a small business cannot decide what to do: sit on the phone, deliver orders, or engage only in management activities. Start combining - and then you will see what works best. This will be the optimal solution to the problem.

4 664 0 Hello! In this article we will tell you how to make the right decision when in doubt.

Every day we make several decisions a day, starting from choosing a menu for breakfast and ending with our social circle. Most of our decisions are harmless and cannot radically change our lives, but there are also those on which our entire future life completely depends. In difficult situations, we often begin to doubt ourselves and the correctness of our decision, rush between several options and waste a lot of time and energy instead of taking action.

How to make the right decision in life

Decision making is a real science. However, there is nothing supernatural in it; every person can quickly and correctly learn to make decisions. It is enough to have courage, take responsibility for your life into your own hands and adhere to several rules and methods.

There are several ways to make decisions:

• heuristic(based on feelings and intuition)
• algorithm(based on informed decisions, study of information and analysis).

Ideally, there should be harmony between rational thinking and intuition.

In addition, the manner in which you solve problems largely depends on your personality type and temperament. Thus, extroverts prefer not to think for a long time, but to immediately begin to act, while introverts analyze a lot and can “freeze” for a long time before making a decision. Both of these strategies can fail: the extrovert will end up making a mess, and the introvert will remain stuck in the problem and wait for it to resolve itself.

Basic rules for decision making

There are some rules that you should follow if you are in doubt while making a decision.

1. Remember your life priorities and stick to them strictly. Think about what is really important to you and why you work, study, etc. Often values ​​and priorities are artificially replaced by society.
   For example, The principle of “money for money’s sake” is becoming fashionable. When applying for a job, think about what you really value and why are you doing it? If you value your family and communication with your children very much, a highly paid job with constant overtime may simply not be suitable for you. By keeping your attention on the main thing, making decisions becomes much easier.
2. Try it if possible. You can think endlessly about what would happen if you went and did something, or you can just try and then make a decision.
   For example If you dream of becoming a famous graphic designer, apply for an internship at an advertising agency. By looking at your dream job from the inside, it will be much easier to make a decision.
3. Limit your options. You should have a choice, but remember that the abundance of options does not help, but, on the contrary, makes it difficult to make a decision.
4. Come up with an algorithm of actions if a certain situation occurs.
   For example, if you started your own business, but after a year it has not started generating income, you stop investing in an unprofitable enterprise. Such “backup” algorithms allow you to calculate risks and insure yourself in case of an unfavorable course of the situation.
5. Seek advice from loved ones and more experienced people. It is important to be able to process these tips. Of course, outside opinions and information received are very important. However, do not forget that sometimes people give advice by projecting their own fears and failures onto your life. Be careful and don't be influenced by other people's opinions.
6. State the problem several times. Seeking advice is useful not so much to hear advice as to talk through the situation. When we repeat our question several times, already at the moment of speaking, new unexpected thoughts and ideas come to us.
7. Stop thinking and analyzing and just act. Sometimes we have nothing to lose in a given situation, so why waste your time and energy thinking about it? Wherever there are no losses, act immediately and decisively.
8. Postpone your decision until tomorrow. Sometimes weighing and making a decision is much easier with a fresh mind. In addition, sometimes it is useful to rely on your subconscious and ask yourself an exciting question at night. Perhaps the first thought that comes to mind immediately after waking up will turn out to be the right option.
9. Limit the time for making a decision. The law of forced efficiency comes into force.
10. Rely not only on your experience, but also on current changes in the situation.
11. If you have made decisions, act immediately!

What should you not do?

1. Don't turn off your intuition. It’s still worth listening to your body and “signs from above.”
2. Do not delay in making a decision and implementing it. Otherwise, you will remain stuck with the problem.
3. Never regret the decisions you make. Remember that it doesn't happen ideal option actions. Everything that happens to us happens for a reason and is already the most correct decision. Maybe if we had made a different decision, there would have been a lot more problems?
4. Do not abuse advice and do not ask everyone.
5. Don't shift responsibility for your life to someone else.
6. Don't be led by your emotions.

Eliminating emotions

Before making a decision, it is very important to get rid of interfering emotions: fear, nervousness, excitement, etc. Such emotions prevent you from concentrating on the main thing, constantly draw attention to minor details and do not allow you to adequately look at the situation.

Fear

In order to get rid of fear, you need to very vividly imagine the worst case scenario. Of course, it will be greatly exaggerated, but replaying the frightening moment in your imagination will allow you to touch own fear and prepare for possible problems on the way to the goal.

Breath

No matter how trivial it may be, deep and slow abdominal breathing will help get rid of interfering arousal. You need to breathe deeply with your stomach, while your chest practically does not move. Take 10 slow breaths in and out, holding your breath slightly for 5-7 slow counts.

Wait

Just wait. Momentary impulses and desires are not always worthy of immediate implementation. Sometimes they pass as quickly as they appear in our heads. It’s better to wait until the wave of excitement and emotions subsides than to do something stupid.

Stay focused

Try to be here and now as much as possible at the moment of making a decision. Stop being distracted by external factors and various little things. If necessary, retreat and be alone. Plunge into the problem headlong and concentrate on it.

Rule 10/10/10

To cool down your ardor, sometimes it’s enough to ask yourself three questions:

1. How will I feel about my decision in 10 minutes?
2. In 10 months?
3. In 10 years?

While doing this practice, try to remain as honest with yourself as possible.

Remember this state when a friend turns to us for advice. We clearly see the situation and do not pay attention to various little things. Try to look at your problem from the outside and give yourself adequate advice.

Ideal "I"

Choose the ideal one from the proposed options. Try not to think about what you want. Our desires do not always benefit us.

Decision making methods

Throughout its existence, humanity has come up with many ways to make the right decision. But before you begin to get acquainted with these methods, you need to understand what the correct solution consists of:

1. Information. These are dry facts without emotional coloring and information distortions.
2. Selectivity in information. Not all facts should be taken on faith or projected onto your life.
3. Concentration on the problem and its solution.
4. Experience. Mostly your own, but the experience of loved ones is also very valuable.
5. Flexibility and ability to adapt to changing situations.
6. An adequate assessment of what is happening.
7. Consistency in decision making and subsequent actions.

Avoid restrictions and boundaries

People tend to choose between two extremes: "Yes" or "No". Should I buy a car on credit or not? Divorce or not? To quit or not? We drive ourselves into the framework of a difficult choice, while the true answer to the question may be hidden in the middle or lie on a different plane altogether.

For example, someone wants to buy a car on credit, but is hesitant because he does not want to go into debt. Perhaps the question should simply be put differently and buy a cheaper car, rent an apartment closer to work, or even find a job near your current place of residence.

Try to think more broadly and avoid yes/no boxes.

Dream Diary

Imagine the goal in all its colors and your future life when you achieve it. Answer the following questions:

• How will I feel?
• Why do I need this?
• Will I become more confident in myself?
• What opportunities will open up for me?

Describe your fantasies in detail in a diary, answer questions and re-read the entries every day. At first you won't believe what you read, but over time your subconscious mind will accept the new picture.

In addition, a clear vision of your own dreams and goals helps you make decisions. The main thing is to always remember why you wake up in the morning.

Expand your choice

Don't get attached to the first option you come across. Check out other alternative solutions. What if it turns out that there are much better and more profitable options? However, you should not expand the choice to an unlimited number of options. Remember that this will only make it more difficult to solve the problem.

Disappearance

Imagine that the option you chose suddenly disappeared. What will you do in this case?

This method allows you to get rid of attachment to one specific decision and get out of the dead end of thinking.

Search for information

Study thoroughly everything related to the problem and ways to solve it. Reading reviews on the Internet has become a common ritual before purchasing a product or service. But for some reason, not everyone does the same when choosing a university or a new place of work.

Research the issue on the Internet and, if possible, communicate with those who worked or studied at this institution. This will already half protect you from making the wrong choice.

In addition, you can ask questions directly during the interview. Do not specify what bonuses the company can offer and whether there are additional “goodies” for employees. It’s better to ask who was in this position before, how many people left this vacancy and why, where they are now and how you can contact them. The answers to these questions will already be enough to make an informed decision.

If it is difficult to make a decision, you can use the Descartes square method. To do this, draw a square on a piece of paper and divide it into four more squares with two lines. In the upper left square, write everything you get by making this decision, and in the right - everything you get by not making it. In the lower squares, respectively, are everything that you will not get if you make this decision, and everything that you will not get if you do not make it.

After you finish writing all the pros and cons this decision All that remains is to calculate their ratio and quantity:

1. Subtract the number of minuses from the number of pluses in the upper right square.
2. Carry out the same operation with the left column of the square.
3. Make a decision.

Three Question Method

There is a theory that before making a decision you need to ask yourself three times. The first time the answer will come based on emotions, the second time - on the basis of logic, and the third time the answer will be the closest to the truth.

Try on different hats

You can make a decision in game form. To do this, imagine that you have seven hats of different colors and each of them can radically change the way you think:

• Red- makes you excitable and emotional;
• Lilac- allows you to always remain rational;
• Blue- includes intuition;
• Black- makes you see only the negative and pass everything through the prism of a defeatist attitude;
• Pink- makes you overly self-confident and incapable of self-criticism;
• Orange— generates impossible projects and makes fantastic plans;
• White - gives wisdom.

Try on all the hats and try to derive the average from the entire flow of thoughts and feelings.

Eliminating uninteresting options

You can make a choice from several alternatives using the elimination method. Remove the most unattractive option out there. Then remove another one and another one. Continue eliminating undesirable options until one option remains.

Lesser of evils

Our choices are not always associated with pleasant things. Sometimes, no matter what we choose, the consequences will not be very pleasant. What to do in this case? Accept the situation as it is and try to choose what will be least unpleasant for you.

PMI method

The abbreviation PMI can be deciphered as Plus, Minus, Interesting . Make a table with three columns. In the first, write down all the possible advantages of the decision made, in the second - the disadvantages, and in the third - just all the interesting remarks, nuances and comments that are neither pros nor cons.

This plate will help you visualize all the advantages and disadvantages of the decision made and once again weigh the pros and cons.

Practice five guiding questions

Let's assume you have already chosen a solution for your problem. How to check whether you are moving in the right direction and whether it is worth changing it? The five question method will help you with this:

1. Do I want this (to become someone/do something/have something)? If the answer is yes, we continue asking questions.
2. If I do this (become someone/do something/acquire something), will I remain in harmony with myself, the world, the Universe and God (for believers)? If yes, then we continue.
3. If I do this, will it bring me closer to my dream? Yes? Let's continue.
4. If I do this, will it violate anyone's rights? If not, then you can ask yourself one last question.
5. If I do this, will it make me or anyone else better?

If you have reached the last question and the answer is yes, you can safely assume that you are on the right track.

Algorithm for independent decision making

To learn how to make decisions on your own, take a piece of paper and a pen.

1. Write on a piece of paper exactly what your problem is.
2. List the reasons why it needs to be addressed.
3. Describe in detail the desired outcome of events.
4. Write down all possible solutions to the issue and actions that need to be taken.
5. Analyze your answers, relate them to current opportunities and start taking action.

How to decide on a job?

As you prepare to leave your job or have multiple jobs to choose from, think about your life priorities and values. If your family is at the forefront of everything, it is wrong to choose a job with long hours and constant delays at work, even if you get good pay for it.

In this case, it would be a good idea to ask a friend for help. After all, real risks and imaginary fears are always better visible from the outside. If you don't have anyone to ask, try giving yourself advice yourself. Try to turn off your emotions, because changing jobs can change your life for both the worse and the better.

How to decide on divorce?

If family life has cracked and everything is bad, sometimes thoughts of divorce may flash through. Don't rush to cut from the shoulder. Wait until your emotions calm down and your head becomes clear. It may be a good idea to live apart from your spouse for a little while.

Do not rush to turn to loved ones for advice. If you later change your mind and make peace with your husband or wife, your loved ones will condemn him/her, consider him/her an enemy and put a spoke in your wheels. Besides, personal life one of those areas of life where decisions should remain exclusively yours, so as not to bitterly regret later that you blindly listened to someone’s advice.

Remember to avoid narrow boundaries and radical solutions. Perhaps the question “To divorce or not?” put incorrectly and there are other solutions, for example: sort out the relationship, work through grievances, have a heart-to-heart talk, improve relationships or contact a family psychologist.

If you understand that you are much better off separately than in an alliance with your partner, and the relationship cannot be restored, perhaps it is worth getting a divorce rather than fighting for a destructive relationship that no one needs.

How can I help you make a decision?

Every person is the master of his own life. Therefore, give others the opportunity to build their own lives, win and make mistakes. If you see that your close person doubts himself, give him the opportunity to make his own decision and do not interfere with unsolicited advice. Of course, if you are asked for advice, you can express your opinion and say what you would do, but no more. You have no right to make decisions for another person or take responsibility for their life.

What prevents us from making adequate decisions? (Dan Gilbert)